Mubeena gives us some tips on how to ease tension.
There is no doubt that the current COVID-19 pandemic has caused a great deal of fear, anxiety and stress. Given the current circumstances, it is normal to feel anxiety and stress. Here are a few helpful tips that may help ease some of the tension. I have also included a section below on how to help children cope with their own anxiety.
Stay informed—The best way to reduce your anxiety is to be sure you have accurate information about COVID-19. Find reliable sources of information such as trusted news organisations and government websites like Public Health England. However, just like with anything, watching or reading news/twitter/Facebook non-stop is likely to create even more panic. Give yourself a break and set aside a few moments during the day to stay updated on the news. Then move on to something else.
Keep routines—By this point, usual day-to-day routines have gone out the window! You might be self-isolating or practicing strict social distancing by going out less. Even so, wake up around the same time each day, get dressed and have your tea and coffee (or whatever makes you feel awake). When evening approaches, start to unwind by turning the lights down low, taking a bath and going to bed at the same time each night. Routines help us to feel safe and in control.
Take care of your body and mind —In the coming weeks, we may be asked to go out even less or to stay home altogether. A few ideas:
• Stretch/yoga
• Walk—please follow government guidelines about self-isolation and social distancing.
• Take deep breaths throughout the day. See below for a breathing exercise if you want something more structured.
• Mindfulness (Lots of resources online for ideas, example: listening to birds)
• Eat healthy
• Get plenty of sleep
Make time to unwind—do activities you enjoy.
• Painting
• Gardening
• Listening to music (have it on in the background if you are cooking, gardening, etc)
• Watching films/shows
• Reading books
• Learn a new skill. YouTube tutorials are amazing
Connect with others—we need one another for support.
• Share silly pictures, videos, jokes. Now more than ever, we need to feel joy!
• Share your feelings with trusted family and friends.
• If you do not have family/friend support:
Samaritans have a brilliant telephone and email service: You can dial 116 123 or email: jo@samaritans.org
Please visit https://www.samaritans.org for more information about their services.
Elemental Breathing Exercise—The purpose of Elemental Breathing is to help us become grounded by connecting us to Mother Earth.
The technique for Elemental Breathing takes only 16 complete breaths. These breaths are meant to be deep but gentle breaths. As you are breathing, it might help to visualise each of the elements. I have included a visualisation. You may wish to develop a daily routine using Elemental breaths or every once in a while as needed.
Air Breath: Breathe IN through the mouth/ and OUT through the mouth (4 times).
Hear the wind in the trees, fanning through the pine needles. Feel the breath of the universe. Feel the breeze on your skin. Watch the air bend the corn and ripple through waves of grain. Air moves in mysterious ways.
Fire Breath: Breathe IN through the mouth /and OUT through the nose (4 times).
Feel the warmth of our life-giving sun on your skin. Fire lights our way in the dark with its fierce light. Fire gives us a boost of energy. This is the breath of surprise and radiance.
Water Breath: Breathe IN through the nose /and OUT through the mouth (4 times).
Visualise ancient streams, deep pools of water and micro-droplets being drawn up though the roots of plants. Imagine soft rain drops dancing on leaves and petals. This breath is purifying, cleansing and refreshing.
Earth Breath: Breathe IN through the nose /and OUT through the nose (4 times).
Feel yourself connecting and binding to the mighty strength of the Earth-its minerals, strong fibres, metals, and lush deep soil. The earth holds us firmly. It grounds us, gets us through a crisis with its nurturing, life-giving energy.
HELPING CHILDREN COPE
Adapted from the Child Mind Institute with a few changes:
Don’t be afraid to discuss COVID-19 (coronavirus):
Most children will have already heard about the coronavirus. Their schools have shut as a result of the virus, so parents shouldn’t avoid talking about it. Not talking about something can actually make kids worry more.
Look at the conversation as an opportunity to convey the facts and set the emotional tone. Your goal is to help your children feel informed and get fact-based information that is likely more reassuring than whatever they’re hearing from their friends or on the news.
Be developmentally appropriate:
Don’t volunteer too much information, as this may be overwhelming. Instead, try to answer your child’s questions. Do your best to answer honestly and clearly.
If you don’t have the answer to the questions being asked, it is alright to tell children you don’t know, but you will find out for them. It’s okay if you can’t answer everything; being available for your child is what matters.
Take your cues from your child:
Invite your child to tell you anything they may have heard about the coronavirus, and how they feel. Give them an opportunity to ask questions. You want to be prepared to answer (but not prompt) questions. Your goal is to avoid encouraging frightening fantasies.
Manage your own anxiety:
Children respond best when parents/carers remain calm and reassuring. If you are feeling anxious, take time to calm down before trying to have a conversation or answer your child’s questions.
Be reassuring:
Hearing about the coronavirus may make some children worry that they will catch it. Listen to your child’s concerns and reassure them by focussing on what is currently known about the coronavirus: that children tend to have very mild symptoms if they are exposed.
Focus on what you’re doing to stay safe. An important way to reassure kids is to emphasise the safety precautions that you are taking. Jamie Howard, PhD, a child psychologist at the Child Mind Institute, notes, “Kids feel empowered when they know what to do to keep themselves safe.”
We know that the coronavirus is transmitted mostly by coughing and touching surfaces. Public Health England recommends thoroughly washing your hands as the primary means of staying healthy. So remind kids that they are taking care of themselves by washing their hands with soap and water for 20 seconds (or the length of two “Happy Birthday” songs) when they come in from outside, before they eat, and after blowing their nose, coughing, sneezing or using the toilet.
Stick to routines:
Routines help children feel safe. It helps them feel that their day is predictable, and predictability helps children feel in control. This is particularly important now that schools and nurseries have closed. Structured days with regular mealtimes and bedtimes are an essential part of keeping kids happy and healthy.
Keep talking:
Tell kids that you will continue to keep them updated as you learn more. Let children know that you are there any time they want to talk or share their feelings.
Play, laugh, love:
Use this opportunity to play games, dance, be silly and give lots and lots cuddles! If you are running out of ideas, check out Make Time 2 Play: http://www.maketime2play.co.uk/ They also have an app to download. Lots of free and fun ideas!
